10. "Did I say 'Jews'? I meant Scientologists"

9. "Food poisoning from a bad knish"

8. "Uhh, hello? I'm famous"

7. "Shouldn't have been drinking with Hasselhoff"

6. "Any press is good press"

5. "I refer all questions to my Jew attorney"

4. "Tired of Britney Spears getting all the 'crazy celebrity' attention"

3. "Oh like you've never gotten drunk and accidentally said, 'Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world'?"

2. "Researching upcoming role as insane washed-up movie star"

1. "Hoping to be named People Magazine's 'Sexiest Anti-Semite Alive'"