10. "Access to Saddam's extensive collection of Barbra Streisand CDs"
(Sergeant Lillian Rodriguez)

9. "I'm the only Jonathan Atwood in the Baghdad phonebook"
(Specialist Jonathan Atwood)

8. "You play cards with those Iraqi government decks -- we use the actual guys"
(Sergeant First Class Timothy Bird)

7. "We get to test out the Army's new bulletproof camel"
(Sergeant Kevin Kirk)

6. "You don't need Dr. Phil to lose weight here -- you just sweat your ass off"
(Private First Class Daniel Ruiz)

5. "When the C.O. isn't looking, I like to tiptoe around the presidential palace and play dictator for a while"
(Specialist Nyria Roach)

4. "It's fun to pick up the phone and say, 'No, Uday and Qusay are not available right now because they're dead'"
(Specialist Jason Williams)

3. "Goodbye standard-issue army tent, hello billion-dollar palace"
(Sergeant First Class Edwin Kolb)

2. "CBS comedies are even funnier in Kurdish"
(Specialist Jonathan Moore)

1. "The farther away from the state of California, the better"
(Specialist Noel Ellis)