10. "Horton Hears A Gunshot"

9. "The Postman Always Rings Twice...Then Breaks The Window And Steals Your Home Entertainment Center"

8. "'Promotion,' 'Bonus' And Other Words You Will Never Hear After Attending A New York City School"

7. "Encyclopedia Brown And The Mystery Of The Dead Guy On The Subway"

6. "Lord Of The Flies, And Other Street Vendor Names"

5. "A Farewell To Strip Joints Thanks To That Nose Bleed Giuliani"

4. "Moby Dick's Self-Destructive Cousin Andy Dick"

3. "A Clockwork Orange That Reads 'Rolex' But Only Costs $10"

2. "Men Are From Mars, Hillary Clinton's From Arkansas, Damn It!"

1. "Of Mice And Donuts"