10. Japanese businessmen address Clinton as "Tubby-san."

9. For a hundred bucks Al Gore rubs a funder's chest with Vap-O-Rub.

8. President starts meeting by saying, "My name is Bill Clinton, and I'm a bribe-aholic."

7. Each video begins with the words, "Directed by Oliver Stone."

6. Clinton keeps peering into camera and saying, "Lookee! I'm on the tee-vee!"

5. Ted Kennedy's recipe for "Irish coffee" contains no coffee.

4. Videos now available in Blockbuster's "Corruption" section.

3. Whenever anyone says, "Sanka," Clinton says, "You're welcome!" and laughs his ass off.

2. Pantsless President stirs his coffee without using his hands.

1. Bill drinks coffee; Hillary drinks Colt