10. "It was a tender act of love between me and my then-boyfriend, Rick something"

9. "Would've been rude not to sleep with him after he spent so much on the camera"

8. "He told me we were making a workout video"

7. "C'mon, there's nothing on that tape that you wouldn't find in any hardcore adult film"

6. "Some ideas just sound better after 9 cosmopolitans"

5. "Dude, I was 'Punk'd!'"

4. "Oh, like you've never had a sex tape thrown all over the Internet"

3. "He swore there was no tape in the camera"

2. "Rehearsing for upcoming CBS television movie: 'The Schwarzeneggers'"

1. "I found a condom in my clam chowder and didn't want to waste it"