10. "I Saw Saddam In a Spider Hole"

9. "Prescription Pills, Prescription Pills, It's Rehab Time For Rush"

8. "Joseph Lieberman Got Screwed By His Friend Al Gore"

7. "I'm Dreaming of Paris Hilton, Having Sex On The Internet"

6. "Michael The Nose Job Jackson, Had a Lot of Legal Fees"

5. "Silent Night, Silent Night, Must Be Another Dennis Kucinich Rally"

4. "Phylicia Rashad, Phylicia Rashad, Phylicia Rashad, I Haven't Seen Her In Anything In a While"

3. "I'll Be Home For Christmas, If Not, Can You TiVo 'Queer Eye'?"

2. "Grope, The Arnold Plaintiffs Claim"

1. "We Wish We Were on Jay Leno, We Wish We Were On Jay Leno, We Wish We Were On Jay Leno, But Our Agent's No Good"