10. "Kids sleep in bunk beds, sit on bunk sofas"

9. "Any movie you take kids to instantly becomes number one film in the country"

8. "You're spending $7.3 million a year in allowance"

7. "Family wiffle ball game has larger attendance than Devil Rays games"

6. "A 'Gap For Kids' just opened in your living room"

5. "In speech on global warming, Al Gore holds up your gas bill"

4. "When your kid says, 'I Love You', you say, 'And you are?'"

3. "Locals refer to you as 'That couple that's always doin' it'"

2. "FEMA is airlifting Cheerios and Barney videos to your home"

1. "Neighbors take up collection to buy you a vasectomy"