10. "This is Martha Stewart. If you need it, I planted a box cutter in the guest chair"

9. "It's Paul Shaffer. So you know, Letterman's had a lot of work done since you last saw him"

8. "Hey, Oprah, it's Larry your neighbor. Can you get me Tony Danza's autograph?"

7. "Dr. Phil here. Cleared my schedule so we can have full session tomorrow"

6. "This is Dubya. If you need a presidential pardon to get you out of this, gimme a holler"

5. "Julia Roberts here. Letterman's all hands during commercial breaks"

4. "It's Jets coach Herm Edwards. Since you're in New York, we could use some help at quarterback"

3. "Regis here. Letterman's all hands during commercial breaks"

2. "Letterman thinks you're coming! This is gonna be the best 'Punk'd' ever!"

1. "It's Nick. Hey, have you seen Jessica?"