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Lists Jokes: Collection of Very Clean Humor

Collection of Very Clean Humor

1. What's in front of a woman and back of a cow?

The letter W.

2. What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval,
delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?


3. What's about 6 inches long, has a vein running down it, and women
love to get their hands on?

A $100 bill.

4. What goes in hard and solid then comes out soft and sticky?


5. What is long, hard and round and sticks so far out a man's
pajamas that you can hang a hat on it?

His head.

6. What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down, and a
dog does on three legs?

Shake hands.

7. What is it that a woman has two and a cow has four?


8. What assists an erection, often has big balls hanging from
it, and is also called a big swinger?

A crane.

9. What do you stick poles inside of, tie down to get it up.
and also gets wet before you do?

A tent.

10. When I go in I cause pain. I cause you to spit and ask you not
to swallow. I can fill your hole.

A dentist.

11. What do you stick your finger in and fiddle with when you're bored?
The best man always has me first.

A wedding ring.

12. All day long, it's in and out. I discharge loads from my shaft.
Both men and women go down on me.

An elevator.

13. What comes in many sizes, drips when it is not well, and makes you
feel good when you blow it?

A nose.

14. When I miss, I hit your bush. It's my job to stuff your box.
When I come, it's news.

A newspaper boy.

15. I offer Protection. I get the finger ten times. You use your
fingers to get me off.

A glove.

16. What has a stiff shaft, has a penetrating tip, and comes with a

An arrow.

17. I make some guys shoot in the air. I usually have a little
pecker. I'm better in your hand than in your bush.

A bird.

18. This is a useful tool, commonly found in the range of 6 inches
long, the functioning of which is enjoyed by members of both sexes.
It is usually found hung, dangling loosely, ready for instant
action. It boasts of a clump of little hairy things at one end
and a small hole at the other. In use, it is quickly inserted,
almost always willingly, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly, into
a warm, fleshy, moist opening where it is thrust in and drawn out
again and again many times in succession, often quickly and
accompanied by squirming bodily movements. Anyone found listening
in will most surely recognize the rhythmic, pulsing sound
resulting from the well-lubricated movements. When finally
withdrawn, it leaves behind a juicy, frothy, sticky white
substance, some of which will need cleaning from the outer
surfaces of the opening and some from its long glistening shaft.
After everything is done and the flowing and cleansing liquids
have ceased emanating, it is returned to its freely hanging state
of rest, ready for yet another bit of action, hopefully reaching
its bristling climax twice or three times a day, but often much
less. What is it?

It is your very own toothbrush.

19. What's brown and sticky?

A stick.

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