10. Had his last name officially changed to "McCheese."

9. When you call 911, you get a recording of him singing show tunes.

8. Demands separate salary for each of his 27 personalities.

7. Trades key to city for plate of delicious buffalo wings.

6. His solution to crime problem: a giant signal to attract Batman.

5. Takes out ad promoting your city as "a great place to shoot your next pornographic film."

4. Can often be seen in the park, loudly declaring himself "Mayor of the squirrels."

3. Agrees to do lame comedy bit on network talk show.

2. Whenever someone says, "Your honor," he says, "No -- but I was last night!"

1. Raised taxes one billion percent.