10. "Letterman won? It's gotta be fixed."

9. "I'm glad CNN won for Best Fabricated News Story."

8. "Could you at least drink the Cuervo from a glass, Mr. Brokaw?"

7. "I really, really, really thought this was Alf's year."

6. "The gown is Bob Mackie, but the stain is President Clinton."

5. "It's nice to see Tom Hanks finally get some recognition."

4. "I don't care if you are Angela Lansbury, you're not getting in without a shirt."

3. "I can't believe that idiot from 'Letterman' didn't kiss his wife."

2. "This is for all the fat girls--especially Richard Simmons!"

1. "Run for cover! More 'Seinfeld' tributes!"