You might be a redneck if you give Santa three pickled eggs and a cold one instead of cookies and milk.
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Chic Murray I was taking my dog out the other day and I met this chap who asked me where I was going. The dog is foaming at the mouth, so I explained that I was on my way to the vet to have it put down. He asked if it was mad, to which I replied that it wasn't exactly pleased about it.