10. "I hold this truth to be self-evident -- you're a babe."

9. "I've just gone through a terrible break-up with Betsy Ross and I don't think I should be alone tonight."

8. "Some people call me the 'Fondling Father'."

7. "You know what they say about men with big signatures."

6. "My teeth aren't the only thing made of wood."

5. "If somebody ever invents the telephone, can I give you a call?"

4. "All men are not created equal, if you know what I mean."

3. "That's a great powdered wig, but it would look even better balled up on my bedroom floor."

2. Insert your own "The British-Are-Coming" joke here.

1. "Give me liberty or give me sex."