10. Starts each day by taking a leak on your desk

9. Parks his car in your office

8. Last week, he promoted a fax machine

7. At brainstorming meetings he always shouts, "I got it -- let's hire a monkey!"

6. All memos are scrawled on the back of damp cocktail napkins

5. Asks the receptionist to patch him through to Jack Daniels

4. Reeks of cocktail onions and pepper spray

3. Spends the afternoon distributing photocopies of his ass

2. Makes a sloppy pass at your wife, then at you

1. He does stuff like this (Video of President Bush trying to open door)