10. Al Gore: Band-Aid Czar
9. Every American man, woman and child gets a free cough drop!
8. If you give 10 bucks to the janitor at the organ bank, he'll let you touch the livers.
7. Anyone with 20/20 vision can now collect royalties from the TV show "20/20."
6. No more plastic surgery for Nancy Reagan
5. All medical bills sent to Ross Perot
4. You break the record for all-time highest body temperature--you keep the thermometer.
3. Roger Clinton can write his own prescriptions.
2. Turn you head and cough exam to be administered by the Gabor sister of your choice
1. Two words: sneeze tax
From "The Late Show with David Letterman", 09/17/1993