10. Complementary handcuffs on pillow

9. 24-hour leather repair

8. Must accept "Madonna dollars"

7. Guy dressed like pirate who says, "Aye, it's Madonna," whenever she enters room

6. Sheets changed every hour

5. Bath tub must fit entire soccer team

4. Gideon Bible with "Thou shalt nots" edited out

3. If she leaves her bra outside the door, it should be returned polished the next morning.

2. Do not disturb sign must be changed to "Please take a number and wait."

1. A squad of pantsless bellboys