10. Has started calling himself "Jerry"

9. Latest batch of "Cherry Garcia" contains beard fragments and guitar picks

8. On way out of work each day, yells, "So long ice cream, daddy'll be back tomorrow!"

7. Recently accused North Korea of stockpiling chocolate chips

6. Has been stalking Mister Softee

5. In private ceremony, married both Baskin and Robbins

4. Just got "lick me" tattoo

3. Walks around nude except for a well-placed waffle cone

2. Asked to be executed on "Donahue"

1. The expiration date on his ass