10. One millionth customer gets to sit naked in fryolator

9. Big Macs with patties the size of flyin' saucers!

8. For every order over $25, Mayor McCheese will whack a guy for you

7. Happy Meals include small containers of nitrous oxide

6. Please make up your own joke about "McHookers" and "Special Sauce"

5. Get 500 Quarter Pounders for the price of 499

4. Buy any sandwich and have clown make-up permanently tattooed on your face

3. Some McNuggets contain shards of glass; some contain valuable diamonds!

2. Free videos of Ronald McDonald in a hotel room with Frank Gifford

1. The 55? McCoronary