10. "C'mon, I've killed dozens of people on television and it's always been cool"

9. "I was gonna shoot her with a squirt gun, but what with the drought and all..."

8. "At the time of the murder I was... Hey, enough about me. How long have you been a district attorney?"

7. "Wake up, America! It was obviously one of them crazy Mullahs"

6. "How could I possibly have time to murder her and still maintain my busy acting career?"

5. Ate British beef moments earlier -- came down with Mad Cow disease

4. Wanted to have a good story to tell at next "Our Gang" reunion

3. "You're allowing yourself to be swayed by a mountain of overwhelming evidence?"

2. "The parrot made me do it"

1. Never should have asked for marital advice from friend O.J.