10. Breakfast, lunch and dinner: Cheese-filled weenies

9. Raise financial backing for my one man ice show -- Davecapades

8. Turn in Uzi for shiny new bicycle

7. Tape all the NFL games on CBS

6. Return camera number 3 to NBC

5. Stop laughing every time I say "The Fox Network"

4. Have applause sign installed in my bedroom

3. To always remain loyal to this fine Network -- unless another network comes up with some more money

2. Learn to teeterboard nude

1. Four words: Mrs. Kathie Lee Letterman