10. Where there's smoke, there's a Ford

9. Have you driven a Ford to the fire station lately?

8. Forget Chevy -- we've got the real Blazer!

7. Available in original or extra crispy

6. Now every Bronco is as exciting as O.J.'s!

5. Ford, the Unabomber of the highways

4. Quality is job one, putting out the fire is job two

3. Like a rock -- a rock of hot, molten lava

2. Aren't you tired of cops who stop you for speeding and ask, "Where's the fire?"

1. Click...vroom...kaboom!