You know your a redneck if you're playing soccer and you say ''I hit my two best balls today... with a rake.''
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Andy Rooney "My wife uses fabric softener. I never knew what that stuff was for. Then I noticed women coming up to me (sniff) 'Married' (walk off). That's how they mark their territory. You can take off the ring, but it's hard to get that April fresh scent out of your clothes."
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