What is the last thing to go through a bug's mind when it hits your windshield?
It's ass.
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Will Yolen "Proclaim yourself 'World Champ' of something- tiddly-winks, rope-jumping, whatever- send this notice to newspapers, radio, TV, and wait for challengers to confront you. Avoid challenges as long as possible, but continue to send news of your achievements to all media. Also, develop a newsletter and letterhead for communications."